Management: “I just returned from the offsite…â€
Me: “Oh. You were gone?â€
Management: “…We’ve decided to replace our old process with a new process…â€
Me: “We had a process?â€
Management:  The new process is C&M. Here is an example, learn it!â€
Me: “This is Fig-Newton wrapper with a circle and three lines drawn across itâ€
Management: â€Training will be offered soon. In the meantime implement this new process in all of your work.â€
Me: â€You gave me a FIG-NEWTON WRAPPER you moron!â€
Management: â€Thanks. I’m off next week to a trade show to learn about technology to help us implement our new process.â€
Me: “Wait! At least tell me what C&M stands for?â€
Management: â€Capricious & Arbitrary. Bye!â€
Me: “But Arbitrary starts with an A!â€
Management: “That’s right. It wouldn’t be arbitrary if it started with an A. Must I teach you everything! Now get back to work. I’ve got to go have a three hour lunch meeting with a vendor.â€